I had Helena going "are you crying? O.o which i was, and i hadn't even gotten past the first paragraph yet
skyewishes wrote a really lovely mini essay on
why lolitas dress the way they do and what it is like to do so
To be Lolita is to live in a world of one’s own creation. It is to re-capture that child-like sense of wonder and joy at the pretty little things in life and fulfill one’s own dream of elegance and feminity. When a Lolita puts on a dress bedecked with frills and bows, ties a ribbon in her hair and steps into her mary janes she is throwing off the mantle of adult responsibility, all her worries and fears melt away and she may smile again, like a little girl and walk with a spring in her step, taking pleasure in life itself, the floral scents of the garden, the sweet drop of tea apon her tounge. The big dirty world becomes, once more, a wonderland created for her enjoyment. Who cares if the common-folk give strange glances or turn their heads? Lolita is waltzing to a different tune, living life in the here and now rather than constantly worrying for tomorrow or regretting the past. The magic of Lolita is the ability to freeze time, in an era that never was, where all girls are princesses and dine on tea and cake. It is to grow up as you imagined you would as a young girl, growing not ‘older’ but only more beautiful, falling in love with the world and gazing with awe apon a clear blue sky.
To become Lolita, to accept this beauty in oneself is no easy task however. A Lolita must surrender her concepts of what is ‘normal’ and ‘expected’ by others, for these false thoughts will hold her back from reaching for her dreams and realising her own fantasy world. The first step then, comes in saying to oneself ‘What makes me happy, must come first.’ This is not pure selfishness, for to live only to the pleasure of others creates an inner ugliness that will consume your dreams, to follow your own happiness is an inspiration to all and will create joy wherever you go. Mockery will turn to envy when they realise you are at peace with your self and way of life. Thus Lolita must break the chains that bind her to these false notions.
When one achieves this, she will feel a sudden lightness, as if a great weight has been lifted from her shoulders and she can now fly, free from the burden she has carried ‘what do they think of me?’ ‘what should I do?’ is replaced by ‘where shall I fly today?’. This is the state of mind we seek.
The nature of Lolita is to escape. However this is often misunderstood, for while one is choosing to abandon the mortal responsibilities; to grow up, to live as a common citizen complete with mundane worries and cares, it is not the choice to only see the bright side of life. Lolita also has her ‘Gothic’ side, that fascination with the false innocence of childhood, the surreal concept of fatality and the shadows that even young maidens cast. Some days she may choose to wear a dress of black, with skulls and crosses as her signature. For this also challenges the common ideal and fulfills the darker wishes of the child within. Even a Lolita who prefers the sweeter style may appreciate these things with a tragic pleasure.
To where does a Lolita escape then? To a world in which only young girls and dolls may live. It is a little slice of sugar-coated history, an anachronism in which she may turn an ordinary room in to a grand manor, or palace of Versailles. Her nieghbourhood becomes her kingdom, her city, here for her to explore and enjoy. In this wonderland curious things happen, wishes may be granted and fairytales come true. For one never knows what is just around the corner when they are seeing the world anew, through the eyes of a joyful child. Don’t be afraid to explore this strange new world, it holds the very pages of your own Lolita story. Every Lolita must find her place and make it beautiful.
To transform into Lolita is to gain an understanding of Beauty. To see the beauty in yourself and the wonderous world about you. The lolita’s heart metamorphoses, like a butterfly, in to that of a beautiful young girl, lady or princess. The maiden of her own fairy tale.
this whole essay really embodys the feeling im going for in this assginment, even if the end resuit isn't technialy Lolita,
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